funny real estate quotes

50 Unique and Funny Real Estate Quotes in 2023

In this article, I will share the best funny real estate quotes you can use to cheer up your clients and make them feel motivated like a friend. As you know to make a sale, first, you have to win their hearts, and then one by one, by using some physiological tricks, you will convince them to buy the house of their dreams.

Trust is the most important thing in this line of business, as those people are investing their life savings through you. They will not compromise it with anything, nor take any house that they do not like 100 percent. These funny real estate quotes will help you win their hearts and friendship and a possible sale if you use them at the right time. You can also use real estate jokes with them to make it more friendly, but don’t mix them up. Use them at the right time.

Table of Contents

Why Use Real Estate Quotes?

The answer is to help your clients relieve Stress and Fear. A full stomach of laughter is the best solution for Stress relief, as many researchers have proved it. They have found that it relieves stress, increases endorphin activity, increases oxygen intake, and makes a person feel motivated. 

Which ultimately increases the chance of psychological acceptance in their mind and heart. So here are those funny real estate quotes I will share that will hit home. 

Best Funny Real Estate Quotes

  • There are two kinds of fears one is rational and irrational. Being afraid of real estate agents is a type of irrational fear.
  • What about your husband? Is he a rich man? No, he is an agent.
  • Today I will talk about the love of my life, the residential house.
  • That crosses the line. What line is it? You can not see it, because I sold it.
  • The mighty Thor decided to pursue a career in real estate. He is going to be real-thor.
  • An agent’s brain is full of miracles. It starts working the day he is born and stops working when he needs to pitch a buyer.
  • My friend is a real estate agent. He greets me House it going?
  • How does a dual agent sleep? First, he lies on one side and then lies on the other.
  • Over 90 percent of people hate carpeting. The remaining hate your carpeting.
  • Did you hear about the last unit in the building? It was last but not leased yet.
  • Why agents do not read novels? Because the only numbers they read are page numbers.
  • I am not a photographer, but I can picture you in this house.
  • Tell me, what does a house wear? Simple, an address.
  • Talking to you makes me feel like a first-time buyer, Nervous but Thrilled.
  • Why did the house go to the medical? It has a window pane.
Marketing funny real estate quotes

Marketing Funny Real Estate Quotes

  • The happiness of your offer getting accepted is like winning the lottery.
  • Planning to move? The ghost in me is dedicated to finding you that perfect house.
  • To get your client to be realistic, put the REAL in real estate.
  • The real estate business is hard work. What you see might not be what you get in the process.
  • I will make you an offer that you will never refuse.

Inspiring Real estate Quotes

  • Buy land, my friend. They are not making it anymore.
  • You make 10 percent of your money in real estate because you are a genius and 90 percent because you catch a great wave.
  • Tough times do not last, but the tough man certainly does.
  • I will forever believe that buying a home is the best investment.
  • NO is the killer of dreams, great ideas, and the end of a conversation. 
  • When real estate comes back, it comes back up like a boom.
  • I am a psychologist who shows homes now and then.
  • To be successful in the real estate business, you must consistently put your client’s best interests first. 
  • The secret to making a billion dollars in this business is that there is no secret.
  • A loser sees the problem in every opportunity, and a winner sees the opportunity in every problem.
  • It is Okay to have all your eggs in one basket but you must control them.
  • The best investment in this planet is the planet itself.
  • Before you know which direction the property market is heading, be aware that there are markets within markets.
  • Look at market fluctuations as your close friend rather than your enemy.
  • The real estate business provides the highest returns, greatest value, and the lowest risk.
  • Home buyers decide in the first eight seconds of seeing a home if they are interested in buying it.
  • Your worst weakness can become your greatest strength.
Inspiring Real estate Quotes
  • In real estate, you learn more about people, community issues, life, and the impact of government, probably more than any other profession.
  • Success is like walking from failure to failure with no loss of excitement.
  • Landlords grow wealthy in their sleep without working actively.
  • Find out where the people are going and buy properties before they get there.
  • The only place your success comes before work is in the dictionary.
  • Know about your customers, so you can provide them with the info that is increasingly useful, relevant, and persuasive.
  • Allow them to speak first because communication is not about talking but listening. 
  • Owning a house is the key to building your wealth.
  • Land monopoly is not only monopoly, but it is the greatest of them.
  • In business, create a sense of demand rather than waiting to have demand.
  • Don’t wait to buy properties but buy them and then wait.
  • You do not have to be smarter just be more disciplined.


So these are the best funny real estate quotes you can use to make your client laugh, inspire them to make the tough decision, and also forward them to the next step. But you must use these quotes at the right time, and that time will come to you through practice. It’s your communication skill, that will allow you to use a real estate quote or joke. I wish you the best of luck.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *